Best Funny Mother Day Quotes, Funny Wishes For MOM

This is a day that is celebrated in the honor of the most integral part of our life. Your Mother is the reason behind your existence, success and everything you have done in your life. So she deserves a lot of happiness and respect from you. No doubt she deserves this the whole year but a specific day from the world high authorities has been fixed for this celebration.

In many countries there is a complete holiday for all the working women by the organizations. These organizations not only free them from work but also motivate their children to make this day memorable for her. They also motivate their children to spend most of the time of this day with their mothers. Many children make this day the most wonderful moment of their mother life. They arrange surprise party and present them gift of their desires. They present her some special things that they know their mother likes. They give their mother wishing cards also. The children should be filled this card with some special words. You should fill this card with some prayers and jokes. Keep in view that your jokes should not make her fun but she should also feel special about this. Here are some funny wishes that you can use to fill your card and make it special and memorable.

Funny Mothers Day Quotes

Funny Mothers Day Quotes

“Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children!” -Sam Levenson

God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.— JEWISH PROVERB

“If evolution really works, how come Mothers only have two hands?” -Milton Berle

“It is never easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it.” -Anon

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.— TENNEVA JORDAN

“I’d like to be the ideal mother, but I’m too busy raising my kids.” -Anon

“Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.” -Anon

Children are the anchors of a mother’s life.— SOPHOCLES

“Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life.” -Anon

“Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age.”-William Feather

My mother is a walking miracle.— LEONARDO DICAPRIO

“My mother told me a million times not to exaggerate.” -Anon

“Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age.”-William Feather

I remember my mother’s prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life.— ABRAHAM LINCOLN

“My mother told me a million times not to exaggerate.” -Anon

When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she’d just make enough for 16 and only serve half.— GRACIE ALLEN

“The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents.” -John J. Plomp

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.— THEODORE HESBURGH

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs… since the payment is pure love.— MILDRED VERMONT

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?— MILTON BERLE

Funny Quotes For Mom

Funny Quotes For Mom

“Any mother could perform the jobs of several air-traffic controllers with ease.” —Lisa Alther

A suburban mother’s role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.— PETER DE VRIES

“A mother is a person who, seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.” —Tenneva Jordan

As is the mother, so is her daughter.— EZEKIEL 16:4

“An ounce of mother is worth a ton of priest.” —Spanish Proverb

“A mom forgives us all our faults, not to mention one or two we don’t even have.” —Robert Brault

Men are what their mothers made them.— RALPH WALDO EMERSON

“In the end, mothers are always right. No one else tells the truth.” —Randy Susan Meyers

“God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.” —Rudyard Kipling

Most mothers are instinctive philosophers.— HARRIET BEECHER STOWE

“We have a secret in our culture, and it’s not that birth is painful. It’s that women are strong.” —Laura Stavoe Harm

Who is getting more pleasure from this rocking, the baby or me?— NANCY THAYER

“It’s not easy being a mother. If it were, fathers would do it.” —The Golden Girls

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.— LIN YUTANG

“When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it’s a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.” —Erma Bombeck

“The phrase ’working mother’ is redundant.” —Jane Sellman

All mothers are working mothers.— UNKNOWN

A mom’s hug lasts long after she lets go.— UNKNOWN

 

“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then, I want to move in with them.” —Phyllis Diller

“Any mother could do the jobs of several air traffic controllers with ease” —Lisa Alther

“If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands?” —Milton Berle

Mothers hold their children’s hands for a short while, but their hearts forever.— UNKNOWN

“There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it.” —Chinese Proverb

“Mom, I love you, even though I’ll never accept your friend request.” —Unknown

Funniest Mothers Day Quotes For Mothers

Funniest Mothers Day Quotes For Mothers

Kids don’t stay with you if you do it right. It’s the one job where, the better you are, the more surely you won’t be needed in the long run.— BARBARA KINGSOLVER

And remember that behind every successful woman is a basket of dirty laundry.— UNKNOWN

The mother’s heart is the child’s schoolroom.— HENRY WARD BEECHER

I was always at peace because of the way my mom treated me.— MARTINA HINGIS

Only mothers can think of the future – because they give birth to it in their children.— MAXIM GORKY

When your mother asks, “Do you want a piece of advice?” it’s a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.— ERMA BOMBECK

The best place to cry is on a mother’s arms.— JODI PICOULT

The phrase ‘working mother’ is redundant.— JANE SELLMAN

A mother’s arms are more comforting than anyone else’s.— PRINCESS DIANA

My mother was a reader, and she read to us. She read us Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde when I was six and my brother was eight; I never forgot it.— STEPHEN KING

My mother is my root, my foundation. She planted the seed that I base my life on, and that is the belief that the ability to achieve starts in your mind.— MICHAEL JORDAN

It’s not easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it.— DOROTHY, THE GOLDEN GIRLS

You sacrificed for us. You’re the real MVP.— KEVIN DURANT, AWARD ACCEPTANCE SPEECH

Being a mom has made me so tired. And so happy.— TINA FEY

Acceptance, tolerance, bravery, compassion. These are the things my mom taught me.— LADY GAGA

As my mom always said, ‘You’d rather have smile lines than frown lines.’— CINDY CRAWFORD

[My mother] always said I was beautiful and I finally believed her at some point.— LUPITA NYONG’O

My mom is a hard worker. She puts her head down and she gets it done. And she finds a way to have fun. She always says, ‘Happiness is your own responsibility.’— JENNIFER GARNER

She drove me to ballet class…and she took me to every audition. She’d be proud of me if I was still sitting in that seat or if I was watching from home. She believes in me and that’s why this [award] is for her. She’s a wonderful mother.— ELISABETH MOSS

[What’s beautiful about my mother is] her compassion, how much she gives, whether it be to her kids and grandkids or out in the world. She’s got a sparkle.— KATE HUDSON

My mom is my hero. [She] inspired me to dream when I was a kid, so anytime anyone inspires you to dream, that’s gotta be your hero.— TIM MCGRAW

If I’ve learned anything as a mom with a daughter who’s three, I’ve learned that you cannot judge the way another person is raising their kid. Everybody is just doing the best they can. It’s hard to be a mom.— MAGGIE GYLLENHAAL

I would say that my mother is the single biggest role model in my life, but that term doesn’t seem to encompass enough when I use it about her. She was the love of my life.— MINDY KALING

Over the years, I learned so much from mom. She taught me about the importance of home and history and family and tradition.— MARTHA STEWART

[Motherhood is] heart-exploding, blissful hysteria.— OLIVIA WILDE

My mother had a slender, small body, but a large heart—a heart so large that everybody’s joys found welcome in it, and hospitable accommodation.— MARK TWAIN

It has been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. My mom says some days are like that.

— JUDIT VIORST, ALEXANDER AND THE TERRIBLE,

[Motherhood is] the biggest gamble in the world. It is the glorious life force. It’s huge and scary – it’s an act of infinite optimism.— GILDA RADNER

She raised us with humor, and she raised us to understand that not everything was going to be great – but how to laugh through it.— LIZA MINELLIE

Blessed is a mother that would give up part of her soul for her children’s happiness.— SHANNON L. ALDER

Before becoming a mother I had a hundred theories on how to bring up children. Now I have seven children and only one theory: love them, especially when they least deserve to be loved.— KATE SAMPERI

Mothers were meant to love us unconditionally, to understand our moments of stupidity, to reprimand us for lame excuses while yet acknowledging our point of view, to weep over our pain and failures as well as cry at our joy and successes, and to cheer us on despite countless start-overs. Heaven knows, no one else will.— RICHELLE E. GOODRICH

They are not kidding when they say that mothers are strong women. We need to be strong in more ways than our children will ever know.— M.B. ANTEVASIN

My sister taught me everything I really need to know, and she was only in sixth grade at the time.— LINDA SUNSHINE

In the end, Mothers are always right. No one else tells the truth.— RANDY SUSAN MEYERS, THE MURDERER’S DAUGHTERS

There is nothing as sincere as a mother’s kiss.— SALEEM SHARMA

I can imagine no heroism greater than motherhood.— LANCE CONRAD, THE PRICE OF CREATION

A good mother loves fiercely but ultimately brings up her children to thrive without her.— ERIN KELLY, THE BURNING AIR

A mother’s love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dates all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.— AGATHA CHRISTIE

Mothers possess a power beyond that of a king on his throne.— MABEL HALE

My mother once told me, when you have to make a decision, imagine the person you want to become someday. Ask yourself, what would that person do?— BARRY DEUTSCH, HOW MIRKA MET A METEORITE

But behind all your stories is always your mother’s story, because hers is where yours begins.— MITCH ALBOM, FOR ONE MORE DAY

Right, except I’m not going to lie to my mom, because what kind of (man) lies to his own mother?— JOHN GREEN, AN ABUNDANCE OF KATHERINES

Our mothers always remain the strangest, craziest people we’ve ever met.— MARGUERITE DURAS

She rejoiced as only mothers can in the good fortunes of their children.— LOUISA MAY ALCOT, JO’S BOYS

A mother is always the beginning. She is how things begin.— AMY TAN, THE BONESETTER’S DAUGHTER

A child’s hand in yours – what tenderness and power it arouses. You are instantly the very touchstone of wisdom and strength.— MARJORIE HOLMES

Clarity and focus doesn’t always come from God or inspirational quotes. Usually, it takes your mother to slap the reality back into you.— SHANNON L. ALDER

Becoming a mother makes you the mother of all children. From now on each wounded, abandoned, frightened child is yours. You live in the suffering mothers of every race and creed and weep with them. You long to comfort all who are desolate.— CHARLOTTE GRAY

My mother always said ‘Don’t bother other people.’ I think that’s good advice.— AMY SEDARIS, I LIKE YOU: HOSPITALITY UNDER THE INFLUENCE

The daughter prays; the mother listens.— AMANDA DOWNUM, THE DROWNING CITY

More Funny Mothers Day Quotes

More Funny Mothers Day Quotes

“The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.” -Calvin Trillin

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.— HONORE DE BALZAC

“My mother’s menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.” -Buddy Hackett

“There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it.” -Chinese Proverb

An ounce of mother is worth a ton of priest.— SPANISH PROVERB

“Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.” -Anon

“Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.” -P.J. O’Rourke

Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.— OPRAH WINFREY

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, I am my mother after all!” -Anon

My mother has always been my emotional barometer and my guidance. I was lucky enough to get to have one woman who truly helped me through everything.— EMMA STONE

Having children just puts the whole world into perspective. Everything else just disappears.— KATE WINSLET

[When] you’re dying laughing because your three-year-old made a fart joke, it doesn’t matter what else is going on. That’s real happiness.— GWYNETH PALTROW

“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” -Phyllis Diller

Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.— ROBERT BROWNING

“When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead.” -Jeff Shaw

“Mother Nature, in her infinite wisdom, has instilled within each of us a powerful biological instinct to reproduce; this is her way of assuring that the human race, come what may, will never have any disposable income.” -Dave Barry

Mother – that was the bank where we deposited all our hurts and worries.— T. DEWITT TALMAGE

“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.” -Erma Bombeck

“If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says ‘keep away from children” -Susan Savannah

All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.— ABRAHAM LINCOLN

“I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can’t find me until after high school.” -Anon

“Ma-ma does everything for the baby, who responds by saying Da-da first.” -Mignon McLaughlin

No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement.— FLORIDA SCOTT-MAXWELL

“Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.” -Ambrose Bierce

“A suburban mother’s role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.” -Peter De Vries

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.— SOPHIA LOREN

“Children are a great comfort in your old age – and they help you reach it faster, too.” -Lionel

“Parenthood is the passing of a baton, followed by a lifelong disagreement as to who dropped it.” -Robert Brault

More Funny Mothers Day Quotes

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